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Meditations on Christ

Apr 11, 2022

by Sherry Chow

It began when I attended a performance of J.S. Bach’s St. Matthew Passion oratorio back in March. This was a special staged performance, with a European ballet company re-enacting the Passion of Christ to Bach’s incredible music. All the dancers seemed to be imbued with the spirit of this game-changing moment in time, especially the young man who played the Christ. Perhaps because his movements were so soft and gentle, when his arrest and various tortures happened, I felt more deeply than ever the extent of Christ’s love for everyone. Even when facing the very worst in people, Jesus showed mercy and allowed himself to suffer through the Passion in order to transmute all back into Love.

The magnitude of his love and compassion is unfathomable, as all Jesus did was to be kind and helpful to others, throwing in a miracle or two, with always a pearl of wisdom to offer. Yet within a week of triumphantly arriving into Jerusalem, he was nailed to a cross and crucified. 

I mulled this over for a few weeks after the performance, feeling the intense trauma of the event, until my heart opened wide enough to receive Christ’s message: even at our very worst, God loves us always. The path of Love may be a brutal one, but its gifts are boundless. With deep humility, I looked at those past hurts within my own heart that I continued to hold onto, and asked Christ to help me melt them back into love. My heart ached still from these past wounds, but after absorbing the experience of Christ’s Passion through Bach’s devotion, as both a truth and an art, my heart felt comforted and cleansed anew. 

As all-powerful as he was, Jesus understood human suffering. He understands our wounds, feels them with us, and loves us regardless. Christ is in the trenches with us. This is a great comfort indeed.

Then just last week I got the chance to spend a couple days in silent retreat at Big Sur, at the Benedictine monastery there. It was in this space that the journey of the Passion came full circle. In meditation overlooking the Pacific, my heart opened further like a little starburst and an inner abundance poured forth truths that now pulsed through my veins with absolute knowing. Christ’s greatest hits of quotes and wisdom ran through me with all their Divine vibration, including the Jesus prayer:

Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me

I forgave myself and likewise gave myself up to the Infinite One, knowing now the wounds in my heart will heal fully through God’s Mercy. And while Christ’s Love is still unfathomable, I am so grateful to be part of it, a bubble in the Divine sea.

Let us all attune to the Christ Consciousness during this holy time.

Very truly I tell you, whoever believes in me will do the works I have been doing, and they will do even greater things than these…” John 14:12